World Men’s Mental Health Day

Every year, World Men’s Mental Health Day comes around, and every year I find myself thinking the same thing: I wish more men knew they didn’t have to carry everything alone. Not because men are incapable or weak — far from it — but because somewhere along the line, many of us were taught that strength means silence, resilience means repression, and emotional pain is a private battle. I wanted to specialise in Men’s Mental Health for that very reason.

I’m a therapist now, but I’m also a man who has had his own share of mental-health challenges. I’ve sat in the client’s chair as well as in the therapist’s. I know what it’s like to lie awake at night, convincing myself that “it’s fine” when every part of my body was saying otherwise. I know what it’s like to feel the weight of expectations, responsibility, pride, and fear sitting squarely on my chest — and to have no idea how to loosen the grip.

So today isn’t just another awareness day to me. It’s personal.

And if you’re a man reading this — or someone who loves, lives with, or works alongside men — I hope something here lands with you in a way that opens a door.

Men Are Struggling — And Many Are Struggling Quietly

If you work in mental health, as I do, you see patterns. You hear stories that echo one another. But even outside of therapy rooms, you don’t have to look hard to notice how many men around you are tired, burned out, overwhelmed, unsure, or silently hurting.

Men are more likely to die by suicide.

Men are less likely to seek help.

Men often wait until crisis before reaching out.

These are not statistics I’m going to throw around lightly or sensationally — you’ve probably heard them before. But what matters more is why this happens. And the reasons are much more human than many realise:

• We’re taught to be the “fixer,” not the one who needs fixing.

• We fear burdening others.

• We worry about being judged or misunderstood.

• We’re unsure how to even describe what’s going on internally.

• We think asking for help is admitting defeat.

I’d be lying if I said these beliefs disappeared the moment I became a therapist. They didn’t. They’re still around. But they look different.

What Men’s Mental Health Actually Looks Like

We often imagine mental health struggles as sadness, crying, withdrawing… the stereotypical images. But for many men, it looks very different. Men often don’t say “I’m depressed.” They say:

• “I’m exhausted.”

• “I’m stressed.”

• “I’m losing patience.”

• “I just can’t focus.”

• “I’m not myself lately.”

• “I feel numb.”

Or they say nothing at all.

Men’s mental health challenges often show up as:

• Irritability

• Anger

• Emotional shutdown

• Overworking

• Drinking more

• Risk-taking

• Physical symptoms like chest tightness, stomach issues, headaches

• Feeling disconnected from partners, children, or friends

• Difficulty with intimacy or vulnerability

• A sense of failure or inadequacy

If any of that feels familiar, I want you to know: it’s not a character flaw. It’s not a sign you’re “not strong enough.” It’s simply your mind and body saying, Hey, something needs attention.

That’s all.

And there’s no shame in that — only humanity.

My Own Turning Point (And What I Wish I’d Known)

I’m not going to pretend I always handled my mental health well. For years, I simply pushed through. The times when I felt lonely, the times when I felt angry, sad and suicidal.

I told myself, “It’s just a rough patch.”

Until it wasn’t.

And eventually, I hit the point many men hit: I couldn’t pretend anymore. The cracks I’d ignored became impossible to plaster over. I was functioning, but not living. Showing up, but not connecting. Helping others, but not helping myself.

What changed everything wasn’t a dramatic moment; it was simply admitting, quietly and honestly, I can’t do this on my own anymore and asking someone to help me.

That admission felt risky. Embarrassing, even. But it was the most courageous thing I’ve ever done.

Therapy didn’t magically fix me — that’s not how it works — but it gave me language for things I’d buried, tools for things I’d avoided, and space for things I’d never voiced. It taught me that vulnerability and strength aren’t opposites. They are partners.

And it taught me that asking for support doesn’t shrink you as a man. It expands you as a human.

The journey isn’t perfect, far from it; and it’s one that I continue to this day.

Why Reaching Out Is So Hard for Men (And What Can Help)

From a CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and IPT (Interpersonal Therapy) perspective, there are a few patterns I see repeatedly in men:

1. “I don’t want to burden anyone.”

I hear this constantly.

Here’s the truth: people who care about you want to know when you’re struggling. Silence actually creates more distance, not less.

2. “I’m supposed to be strong.”

Who decided strength doesn’t include emotional awareness, communication, or self-care?

Strength isn’t the absence of difficulty. It’s the willingness to work through difficulty.

3. “I don’t know how to talk about it.”

Totally fair. Most men haven’t been taught the vocabulary for emotions.

Therapy isn’t about showing up and spilling everything perfectly — it’s about learning at your own pace.

4. “Things aren’t that bad.”

If you wait until things are unbearable, you’ve suffered needlessly.

It’s okay to seek support early, before crisis hits.

5. “No one will understand.”

You’d be surprised. Once men start opening up — even a little — they often discover they’re not nearly as alone as they assumed.

What I See In the Therapy Space

I see men who have spent years, sometimes decades, holding things together for everyone else.

I see fathers terrified of letting their families down.

I see sons trying to live up to expectations that were never spoken aloud.

I see partners who want to be present and loving but don’t know where to begin.

I see professionals who seem successful on paper but feel empty inside.

I see young men who feel lost and older men who feel worn down.

And I also see something else:

Once men begin talking — even cautiously, even clumsily — something shifts. Relief is often the first thing. Relief that they don’t have to keep everything inside. Relief that someone is listening without judgement. Relief that they’re allowed to be human.

And from that relief comes possibility.

Because when you create space for your pain, you also create space for joy, connection, meaning, and growth.

You Don’t Need a Crisis to Need Support

One of the most damaging myths is that therapy is only for extreme situations.

Here’s the reality I wish more men understood:

• You can go to therapy because you’re stressed.

• Because you’re exhausted.

• Because you’re confused.

• Because you feel stuck.

• Because you can’t switch your mind off at night.

• Because something feels “off” and you can’t pinpoint what.

• Because you want to understand yourself better.

You don’t need to hit rock bottom.

You don’t need to justify your pain.

You don’t need to wait until you’re falling apart.

If your mind is whispering, “Something isn’t right,” that’s enough.

A Few Things I Want Every Man to Hear Today

1. You’re not weak for feeling overwhelmed.

You’re human. Full stop.

2. You deserve support just as much as anyone else.

Your needs matter too.

3. Your struggles don’t define your worth.

Not as a father, partner, friend, colleague, or man.

4. Talking about what’s difficult isn’t self-indulgent — it’s responsible.

The people around you benefit when you’re mentally well.

5. You don’t have to have the words for everything right now.

Just being open to trying is enough.

If You Love or Care About a Man Who’s Struggling

World Men’s Mental Health Day isn’t only for men — it’s for everyone who has a man in their life.

If someone you care about seems distant, stressed, overwhelmed, angry, withdrawn, or “not himself,” here are a few gentle ways to support him:

• Ask “How are things really?” and mean it.

• Give him space to open up at his own pace.

• Don’t jump in with solutions too quickly.

• Remind him he’s not a burden.

• Normalize seeking support — therapy, GP, talking to someone.

• Share resources without pressure.

• Let him know you’re there, consistently.

Sometimes the smallest nudge can make the biggest difference.

If You’re a Man Reading This…

If any part of this resonated with you — even a line, even a sentence — consider this your sign.

Consider it permission.

Or encouragement.

Or simply a reminder that you don’t have to figure everything out alone.

There is no perfect moment to reach out for support. Only the moment you decide you deserve to feel better than you do right now.

Whether it’s therapy, talking to your GP, opening up to someone you trust, or even starting with an anonymous support line — take the next step. Any step.

You don’t have to commit to massive change today.

You just have to be willing to start a conversation.

If You Know a Man Who Might Be Struggling…

Send him this post.

Invite him for a coffee.

Check in — genuinely.

Tell him he matters and he deserves support.

Sometimes the connection we offer others becomes the bridge that saves them.

How Bradshaw Therapy & Wellbeing Can Support You

At Bradshaw Therapy & Wellbeing, I work with men from all backgrounds — professionals, tradesmen, students, fathers, retirees, you name it. There is no stereotype, no expectation, no “ideal client.” Just real men trying to navigate real challenges.

As a male CBT and IPT therapist who has been on the other side of the therapeutic relationship myself, I understand how daunting it can be to reach out. But I also know how transformative it can be.

Therapy can help with:

• Stress and burnout

• Anger and frustration

• Depression and low mood

• Anxiety and overthinking

• Relationship difficulties

• Self-esteem challenges

• Life transitions

• Grief and loss

• Emotional numbness or shutdown

• Feeling lost, stuck, or overwhelmed

You’re not expected to walk in and bare your soul. You’re simply invited to start where you are.

You’re Not Alone — Even If It Feels Like It

World Men’s Mental Health Day is a reminder, but the reality is this:

Men’s mental health matters every single day of the year.

Your mental health matters every single day of the year.

Whether you’re the man carrying the weight, or the person who sees him struggling, the first step is the same:

Don’t stay silent.

Reach out.

Talk.

Ask.

Share.

Listen.

Connect.

Support is available.

Help is available.

Change is possible.

And you’re worth that change.

If you’re ready to take that step — or even if you’re just considering it — Bradshaw Therapy & Wellbeing is here. Truly here.